Miss Placed Title

This doesnt have a title because it doesnt have just have one things I'm talking about.
I first sit here sore, realizing I have wasted a week away, not becuase I'm stuck to a couch because I had surgery, (which I am, but not the point). I have been sitting here watching tv, movies, going on myspace, and chating online. Only in the past 2 days have I actually done something. I finally worked on a logo for a company, I got up and walk around outside, and today I started really getting into The Hobbit and I got; a photoshop cs2, a flash mx book, and I found my illustrator 10 book. But for the last week I have done nothing, I could have read the bible, learned some more, edited some videos. The other week Sara (forced) made me make pray cards, I didnt see a point to them, I still kind of don't because I don't work that way. But I wrote on there for one thing is Time Management, I was thinking at the time that I was getting busy and need to get priorities set and manage those times that I have. But this week I see it in a new light. Why do I sit at the computer watching movie and going on things like myspace, when I could enlighten myself with a new study in something like a book of the bible or something.
My second thing is well my future. I'm graduated, I need a job, I need to pay of my parents, get a car, build a new computer, help pay for college, pay for random things, get cloths, buy a new video camera, upgrade the mac(g4), I would like to get an ipod, I need to pay for plane tickets if Sara and I stay together to see each other and I need cash for cash. I just think of the near future, just looking for those jobs, traveling, and relationships. Moving to Florida with Adam, going to college. College, its not a normal college, I'm going to get my bacherlors degree in 22 months, that about 30 credits every 11 months. I dont know how I'm going to handle this. Also just living with Adam, how thats going to work, being on my own, having to do everything, no one to fall back on, its going to be insane. I think of trying to find time and money to see Sara and/or just talk to her on the phone. I think of afterwards the far future, the moving back or going to boston or philly or something. I just dont know. Time will tell, but when is it going to tell.
I'm actually scared for everything... I'm never scared, but I'm getting there.
I just don't know.

time

I have 10 days. I have my computer, a tv, movies, and books. I sit here in and out of reality. Even now Im not sure what time/day/location it is. Not to say I dont know these things, but more or less that I forget them. I fall asleep and wake up in a new world. I dont know whats going on. Im locked in this basement in pain and lonely. I hurt from not doing anything. But I also realize in the next few days I will be feeling better, enough to stay awake for a while and read, watch a full movie, or even write. Ive been sitting here almost falling asleep while typing this. The only thing that is keeping me awake is my loud music, and that only works so long. I miss my friends. I miss being able to do things. Im done with school, I really need to get a job, but cant yet bc Im laid up. I want to visit people, but cant bc Im stuck to a couch. My life is wonderful, Sara came over yesterday and took care of me and today she got me dinner and stuff. Levi Knoll made a big pot of soup for me (chicken and rice, so good) and today he stops by and drops off a bunch of his dvds for me to watch. Matt Bedwin stopped in and said hi too. Im not begging for more visitors but do wish to see more of my friends. Im done now, Im almost asleep. Untill next post, keep your stick on the ice.

keeping it

i might not update this alot, this will be more of a personal one, that a select few will read. so dont worry, im keeping it, and going to update it. but myspace will be my social party area, and this will be like my coffee with a close friend area.
yuppers. sushi is good

trash or save?

im still not sure if i want this thing or not. but dont worry, till i decide to keep it, i will post, if i decide not to, it will be deleted